You’ve got to blurt it when you have to, and these NFL players did not think twice.
Here are some of the funniest NFL player quotes.
“I love me some me!” ~ Terrell Owens
“I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards – whichever comes first.” ~ George Rogers
“All Grange can do is run. And all Caruso can do is sing.” ~ Bob Zuppke
“It might have been the hardest hit I took all day.” ~ Drew Brees (after a fan hit him with a water bottle)
“If you’re mad at your kid, you can either raise him to be a nose tackle or send him out to play on the freeway. It’s about the same.” ~ Bob Golic
“The shoulder surgery was a success. The lobotomy failed.” ~ Mike Ditka
“I wouldn’t ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was important — like a league game.” ~ Dick Butkus
“Football isn’t a contact sport; it’s a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.” Vince Lombardi
“I like to believe that my best hits border on felonious assault.” ~ Jack Tatum
“You don’t have to win it. Just don’t lose it.” ~ Ray Lewis
“Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” ~ Joe Theismann
“It’s almost exciting to think about all the room for improvement that we have.” ~ Geno Smith
“Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl.” ~ Houston Oilers
“He couldn’t spell cat if you spotted him the C and the T.” ~ Thomas “Hollywood” Henderson
“You have to play this game like somebody just hit your mother with a two-by-four.” ~ Dan Birdwell
“I feel like I’m the best, but you’re not going to get me to say that.” ~ Jerry Rice
“I resigned as the Broncos coach because of illness and fatigue. The fans were sick and tired of me.” ~ John Ralston
“I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid.” ~ Terry Bradshaw
“Football is easy if you’re crazy as hell.” ~ Bo Jackson
“I don’t know whether I prefer Astroturf to grass. I never smoked Astroturf.” ~ Joe Namath
“Ex-girlfriends who wish they wouldn’t have dumped you, they’re questioning themselves right now. So, it’s fun.” ~ Steve Smith
“We can’t run. We can’t pass. We can’t stop the run. We can’t stop the pass. We can’t kick. Other than that, we’re just not a very good football team right now.” ~ Bruce Coslet
“I’ve been big ever since I was little.” ~ William “The Refrigerator” Perry
“Straight cash, homey.” ~ Randy Moss
“P.S. Getcha Popcorn Ready.” Terrell Owens
“We couldn’t do diddly poo offensively.” ~ Jim Mora
“Uh, playoffs??? Playoffs!? Don’t talk about playoffs! You kidding me? Playoffs? I just hope we can win another game!” ~ Jim Mora
Although this one is rebutted since time immemorial, it had the staying power no one expected.
“So Doug, how long have you been a black quarterback?” ~ Butch John
Instead, the question was: Doug, it’s obvious you’ve been a black quarterback all your life. When did it start to matter?